This mind of mine of which I try to settle
Flits from one thought, another reason, & a transitory hope
Using effervescent words in which to cope
To often shut doors and invisible walls built
Leave elusive boundaries we try to cross out of guilt
Borders trampled without respect
I feel my hackles raised & my defensiveness spring unchecked
I’ll try not to presumptuously assume
You’re motives suspect
And my anxiety I hope won’t exhume
From the disemboweled remains of gloom
Too easy is it to attribute to others evil intent
Yet excuses for my actions I blindfolded can invent
Let’s circumvent expectations & prejudgment
We ought to lead by the example we on us want spent
Copyrighted © March 20, 2017 by DVon | V o n n a
I’ve been absent. Perhaps noticeably so and for that I thank you for your patience. While I can’t give you specific reasons (there isn’t one). I can say that I’m hoping to pick back up on my posting. For those of you who have stuck with me for a bit you’re more than use to my occasional lapses into silence before a quick about-face.
As I often do I went through a introspective beat where I questioned where I wanted to go with this journal. I wondered if I should make it private, remove it, or start a new series of poems. When I realized I didn’t feel as if Quill was complete. For that as well as for those willing to hang around and catch up from time to time made me want to continue. But really; I’m here to record my thoughts whether they are well received or not and that is what clinched the decision for me.
If I close this blog tomorrow I’ll just open another in its place so why began anew without a genuine, valid reason to do so? I’ve been really slacking when it comes to reading others blogs. Honestly, I have a lot needing read in a given day and while I love reading, it’s just not feasible to read-all-the-things. I’d like to try to do better, however I won’t make a promise I’m likely to break.
So, hello old friend! (That means you reader) Did you miss me?
Can I love you without noticing every flaw,
Without being driven crazy by your quirks and failings?
We disagree on nearly every utterance between us
And yet, I live yearning to see you tomorrow
It’s like bad decisions & poor reasonings you breath
But you trust me to keep us afloat
Misunderstandings flourish freely and still
I know you’ll have my back in a pinch
Is that not the relationship between family?
Where both mother and daughter each fight the other
On the wisdom of their choices?
And just as my horse gets high enough
to match the bridge of my nose
You spout history and experience I can only read about
I realize no matter how much smarter I appear
You didn’t survive til now on nothing
Hence why you strive so hard to help me grow
Dedicated to: M.D.
Copyrighted © February 20, 2017 by DVon
I’ll walk to the edge of the road, without a backwards glance determined to start over anew
I won’t hesitate with “what if’s” or “maybes” that’s past, instead forward this journey like dew
Refreshing, I’ll strive to be, fresh faced, and devoid of previous battles of envy
No longer yearning for something far enough outside of reach, instead; I’ll move closer my step
This goal, I set out to breach will awash me in a new hue
“Whom of us are truly willing to start over?”, I ponder very few
We have the wherewithal yet rarely employ the adequate level of frenzy
O if only the child-like enthusiasm we’ve kept
Within me, I fight urges to question my every attempt
Why do we doubt before others share their version of “friendly” tips?
It’s not for your benefit that one tells you to give up when you’ve barely managed to try
So why step on your own toes just as you’re learning to fly?
We’re so fragile we’ll break from the softest of a feathery touch
Yet we’re able to withstand the wind
The harshest of rains can be weathered
Once we’ve silenced the demons within
You’re best is yours and is not a stick that can be measured when lent
So don’t bend you shape to fit a mold you were never meant
Why measure me by “b” and “c” when I’m obviously the center of my life?
To keep up with a Jones, to say I’m right when wrong, to struggle for what you own is counter productive to what I strive
Copyrighted © January 12, 2017 DVon
*Because this was written on a whim (just now) I may rewrite, delete, or add a part II to this.
Am I selfish, for not wanting to share every single piece that is me?
You who is flexible enough to yield, bend, and adjust to anything,
Why am I constantly chipping off chunks of myself to accommodate you?
Me the inflexible, rule follower, who actually makes you keep to your word, why am I often shattered?
I’m mean, and selfish, and horrible for actually doing as I set out to acheive.
While you the giving, understanding, loving one; resents everytime I don’t do as you wish.
But when have you ever given me respect, understood my choices, loved me even when I didn’t yield to your every whim?
O I forgot, you haven’t because, you refuse to leave me to my decisions without labeling me
Copyrighted © January 10, 2017 DVon
The sounds of ticking soothes
With every forward lurch the seconds slip by
Further from yesterday; moved
Minutes pass, forcing the minutiae details of past wrongs, past mistakes, past grievances to fade into distant echoes of never
Promises to never forget, never forgive, never heal from wounds incurred from pain inflicted
Ones focus with time thus shifted
What matters today might not matter tomorrow
So while the length can’t be predetermined; wounds truly mend with time
Seconds, minutes, then hours finds the wound gradually heals
Days, weeks, even years yield reflective forms of introspective thoughts
Decades, centuries, perhaps eons pass
Much wiser, stronger, and adept to break less fragmented
Instead shallow cracks emerge; more easily repairable by time
Copyrighted © December 31, 2016 DVon